Frogger Accidentally Dissected In Middle School Science Lab
Abraham Lincoln Middle School, Lickskillet Alabama - After years of surviving dangerous highways packed with erratic asshole drivers and traversing rapid rivers on the backs of sinking logs, vintage video game superstar Frogger has finally met his demise at the hands of two 6th graders. Sources say that Frogger ended up being accidentally packed in a shipping crate full of dead frogs after he stumbled into it drunk following a wild night of alcoholic passion and sexual debauchery. The student Spretch Vingles, and his lab partner Glorious Hugo were shocked to find the remains of a legend as they removed pixel after pixel with their scalpels and tweezers. Their teacher was executed by Konami’s P.R. department the following morning. Sadly, the aftermath of the whole fiasco has been even more devastating, as Frogger’s candle light vigil was held across the street from a really busy road, leading to the death of a hundred more frogs.
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