One time I was too drunk i almost pee on the sink

 Ah yes.. memories coming back to me.... i wasn't drunk though

When I was 21, I was living with my uncle and my cousin (who was not his son) in Atlanta. We considerd ourselves players. Those two were professional lushes. I had barely touched a drink before. Anyway, one Friday night, we were all at home drinking top shelf alcohol, eating chicken, and watching movies. My uncles incredibly fat girlfriend was hanging out with us.

That night, we sat around the table drinking, and I got drunker than have ever been or will ever be again. I got the idea in my head that I was going to perform oral sex on this fat chick (who had fallen asleep on the sofa). I crawled away from the table Solid Snake style, and.........that's all I remember. I woke up the next day, and there was chicken vomit everywhere. My head was pounding. Nobody would tell me what happened (to date, nobody still has), and my uncle's fat girlfriend started coming on to me. I keep having bizzare visions of my uncle grabbing my penis, while I'm in the bathroom crying too.

So, I moved out from the shame. I may have had oral sex with my uncle's fat girlfriend. I puked all over the house -at least 4 different rooms. AND I believe (but can't prove) I got molested. The ONLY thing I'm proud of about that night is that I didn't go out and buy an Atari Jaguar. Didn't touch alcohol again for about six years!

Just wait until tonight and our victory against England for the 6 Nations, I should be quite drunk too by that time...

For the time being, the only story I can remember is about some friend throwing up on one of my N64 controller, a few monthes ago. As they're becoming rare, you can guess that if I had not been quite drunk too, I would have been mad at him.

Well, good luck with that and don't get into too much trouble.

Last time I got drunk I was with friends in a friend's basement. I went upstairs so I could go outside and I notice that one of my friends and his girlfriend were cuddling on the couch. So I went back down stairs and went up to my fat & hairy friend and said to him "Dude, I will give you 10 dollars if go up stairs in nothin but you underpants and get in front of (friend and his girlfriend) and take you underpants off and jump on them and stay on them for as long as possible." A bunch of friends and I were cracking up and the fat friend jumped at the opportunity. He riped his clothes off, bolted upstairs and me and another friend were on the stairs were we could some of what was going on. Then, we saw the fat guys boxers fly up in the air and we heard the screams of the girlfriend. I was laughing uncontrollably. My friend wasn't to pleased with what happened but, he forgave me the next day.