/rant

So it has happened again, another dump on a good man and boyfriend. Another heartbreak to add to the lists of heartbreaks. So much so the figurative heart is nothing but a shamble of dust particles and splinters.

Basically, me and my girlfriend broke up. Going on a year and 3 months. Backstory: I was doing long distance with the then girlfriend of a year and a month and 4 months and more long distance, when I was dumped. I was at a new highschool, a thousand miles away from previous one when I was broken hearted. Long distance had its toll. Well, I met a new girl. I vented to her and two weeks after sad breakup with my ex, I started dating her.

Pass a year and 3 months later of the best time of your life, happiness and "true" love. Plans for marriage, kids, the whole shibang. Long distance again because of college and money issues. Reno to Tallahassee Florida. Not too bad seeing as you are soulmates and every 2 months or so you spend time together fo ra weekend or weeks. Okay. New semester starts, two weeks into last 4 months of long distance. She calls and I ask if she is still going to move here for the next school year, ending long distance.

Hesitates. Doubt. My fear. Long conversation and she says no. Says she would blame me for giving up her life there and that she is starting to like an old ex a thousand miles away, but still loves me. Blam! Heartbroken. At least she had the love and decency in her heart to tell me and have us mutually end it instead of live a sham. She still loves me, just not as much, and she will hurt because of this too. But heartbreak is worse for me.

/rant

Basically, love is a lie. "True" love is an even bigger one. Soulmates too.

What I am asking is friendly advice to avoid the usual breakup/heart symptoms. Hate, resentment, alcohol abuse. The usual. What are good ways to break old habits, like texting her all day and thinking about her, while still keeping said breakup mutually good and unhurtful and not guilting her everytime I talk to her?

Thanks for anything, this is the second time this has happened to me, and this time it has come literally out of the blue. My faith in love and especially long distance, is gone. Never say never, but literally it will be years for love and never for long distance.

It's 3:15am and I have court in 5 hours. I'll be back, though. Keep holding on.

You're young. You'll get over it. I promise.

Yes, love is a lie. But everyone's doing it, so, should you.

It's all about mind tricks.

But before you can convince your lies are truths, you must first believe in your own lies. That is when lies became truths.

So, is love really a lie? Yes and No.

Totally my opinion, but should you follow, I held no responsibility should it hurt you in any way.

You should never, and I mean never, becomes "sissy" toward your lover. By "sissy", I mean, being a yes-man to her. People likes to play hard-to-get. Easy come, easy go.

Think of it like flying a kite. You've gotta pull and let go. That way, it keeps things interesting and the relationship won't go stale.

Give her sweet. Give her bitter, too. You keep giving her sweets and she'll just get bored.

How you go about giving her those is all depending on the situation.

Give her breathing room sometime.

Be jealous sometime, even if it doesn't make sense.

Ignore her sometime.

So, yeah, it's like a game. Just make sure you've got quarters for a new game should your current one is game over.

Long distance hardly ever works. If you need to travel for more then 1.5 hours, is my experience, you'll have a hard time.

My advice is, start sporting. I don't know what you do usually but when I get mad at anything I go running or boxing (not sparring by the way, just in case.) Whenever I feel any anger boil up I use it's energy to move forward again, or do soemthing different like push-ups besides running, anything. Great way to channel anger.

When at home, start playing games. You might not feel like it but going online and start playing is a great release. If you do good you will at least feel some adrenaline from winning. If you do badly, your at least pissed off at something else for some time.
Off line isn't nearly as succesfull though.

Also, start hanging out with friends a lot.

And do not contact her for some time. Let her come. If she doesn't, you'll at least get over it sooner.

You felt love before your heart was broken, yes? Then that's how you know love isn't a lie. I'm not going to say much more because I know whatever I say will probably be overshadowed by someone far more wise.

That's impossible. Mods are supposedly far more wise than us commoners.

The only common denominator is me and long distance. But I really am the best boyfriend around, so maybe that has something to do with it. Some dont want to settle so soon, like my first ex. But this one is different. Its just the cruellness of long distance.

"I vented to her and two weeks"

Okay, this is the part im stuck on. You what?