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Forums - General - The Official "Funny Jokes" Thread

Damn, appolose has some good ones.



We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers…Also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls.  The only thing that really worried me was the ether.  There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge. –Raoul Duke

It is hard to shed anything but crocodile tears over White House speechwriter Patrick Buchanan's tragic analysis of the Nixon debacle. "It's like Sisyphus," he said. "We rolled the rock all the way up the mountain...and it rolled right back down on us...."  Neither Sisyphus nor the commander of the Light Brigade nor Pat Buchanan had the time or any real inclination to question what they were doing...a martyr, to the bitter end, to a "flawed" cause and a narrow, atavistic concept of conservative politics that has done more damage to itself and the country in less than six years than its liberal enemies could have done in two or three decades. -Hunter S. Thompson

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I'll encode mine in binary since its pretty bad too.

 

01110001 00111010 00100000 01001000 01101111 01110111 00100000 01100100 01101111 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110000 01110010 01100101 01110110 01100101 01101110 01110100 00100000 00110101 00100000 01100010 01101100 01100001 01100011 01101011 00100000 01100111 01110101 01111001 01110011 00100000 01100110 01110010 01101111 01101101 00100000 01110010 01100001 01110000 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110111 01101111 01101101 01100001 01101110 00111111 00001101 00001010 00001101 00001010 01100001 00111010 00100000 01010100 01101000 01110010 01101111 01110111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01101101 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100010 01100001 01110011 01101011 01100101 01110100 01100010 01100001 01101100 01101100



I rear ended a car this morning...
I tell you, I knew it was going to be a REALLY bad day!
The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!
He looked up at me and said "I am NOT Happy!"
So I said, "Well.... Which one ARE you then?"

=D



haha omg wow =P



Proud Owner of  a Wii and Xbox 360 and a PS3(When I get the money)