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Forums - Nintendo Discussion - Rumor: Nintendo Buys Platinum to Make MarioKart 8 DLC

 

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Recently, Nintendo announced 48 additional courses coming to Mariokart 8 Deluxe in multiple waves going through the end of 2023. Expecting fans to be overjoyed by their dedication to creating Mario Kart 9 and also amusing fans with 48 remastered courses made by a small B-team, Nintendo was shocked to find out people wanted them to dedicate their full resources and manpower to remaking older courses, and further delay Mariokart 9, instead of the remastering route they took. Because of this, Nintendo is rumored to have done two things to give Nintendo fans not what they have asked for, but what they deserve after their silly perspectives:

-Purchased Platinum Games - Not shared with the public yet.

- Are making Platinum Games exclusively develop two waves of DLC courses for Mariokart 8 Deluxe. Literally every other Platinum IP is sold off to Atari and goes nowhere.

    1. The first wave, launching March 2024, will be straight ports of older Mariokart courses that didn’t make the remastered/remake cut. These will not be visually enhanced whatsoever, even the resolution and fps will be what they were when the games came out originally, with the only difference being Hideki Kamiya being the only playable character and the only differences between selection choices being what choice words he shouts at you while racing.
    2. The second wave, launching March 2025, has the codename “**** You Booster Pass”. It is to be determined what the *’s mean. These maps will be brand new maps made in the Super MarioKart engine, using those mechanics as well. The four main button controls will be reversed on the joycons/pro controller (ABXY will be arrows up, left, down, right, and the arrow buttons will be ABXY), and your kart will be unable to drive vertically and instead will have a constant diagonal drift. Lastly, there is rumored to be a non-stop item mode, where Platinum removed item boxes and instead will give you a new one the second you use an item you are holding on to, and all items are completely random with the same likelihood of happening regardless of placement.

All in all, by December 2025, Mariokart 8 Deluxe will officially have 120 courses. There are even suggestions Nintendo may continue with this method if the salt of gamers can salinate ⅓ of the world’s fresh water supply by that date.

As with all rumors, take this with a *insert cliché*.



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Does it count as a rumor... if you make it up?



You are bound to love Earthbound.

What's the source of this rumour?

You making it up is not a rumour.



I liked them better when they bought nothing for $0.



coolbeans said:

I liked them better when they bought nothing for $0.

;)



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Bandorr said:

Does it count as a rumor... if you make it up?

and new Nintendo insider rises



twintail said:

What's the source of this rumour?

You making it up is not a rumour.

Maybe we're in a simulation and we're all made up.



God Dangit Dulfite !!

Next time, make it less obvious :P



Switch Friend Code : 3905-6122-2909 

Yours threads are easily among the best. Don't stop making these silly entertaining ones.



Mar1217 said:

God Dangit Dulfite !!

Next time, make it less obvious :P

Sometimes I like to be real subliminal, other times more direct. When a particularly ridiculous mindset becomes prevalent here, the only reasonable response is outright, in-your-face sarcasm.