Forums - General Discussion - Can't Keep This Up

I'm not very well known here obviously, I haven't officially been here for long (been a lurker for years though). So what I'm going to say honestly doesn't hold any weight or mean much but I at least want to give a proper farewell instead of just disappearing. So I've been suffering from a very terrible extreme case of depression, lets just say one of the last things I ever wanted to happen, happened at the beginning of this year. I began actually being more active and discussion in threads and what not to try to help me deal with this issue, and to distract me from it if possible. I've talked to countless of people, my brother, my parents, close friends, a psychiatrist which honestly I don't really have money for. And nothing. In fact I feel worse as time has passed, add that to how things gradually have become worse, a bunch of undesirable situations, lost chances, burned bridges, lost opportunities, and too many uncertainties for the future. I'm mentally and physically in a lot of pain, throughout the days I experience heart pains, headaches or migraines, and pain on other parts of my body. I've barely been able to sleep most of the time I just lay there crying and don't manage to sleep unless I stay up for at least 2 days before I can sleep and when I do sleep most of the time I have to deal with nightmares or dreams that really fuck me up when I wake up. So I don't really get a break from this at any time. Many days I half expect when I do sleep I may not wake up. It looks like I've rapidly aged a bit. I'm not a suicidal person, I am very against suicide, but it really is hard to cling to anything anymore. I've only been trying to keep going for my brother and parents, but honestly I'm finding it really hard to keep clinging onto anything. As pathetic as it sounds Kingdom Hearts 3 and The Final Fantasy 7 Remake are two reason I've even been trying so hard to keep going, but like I said It's getting too hard. So that's about it. Farewell everyone, good luck, make sure you appreciate every moment you have with the people and things that mean the most to you, if you can maybe go out of your way every now and than to show them how much they mean to you, never stop enjoying the games and things you love. And hopefully if I'm still around and magically everything turns around and gets good I'll come back to annoy you guys.



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What's wrong ?



I hope everything gets better. I know its hard to abruptly say farewell and reach out to any community like this, so I hope you're able to persevere and enjoy life more.  I genuinely wish I could say something better than this, but yeah, please take care of yourself



I hope you don't go. In fact, you should stay. You should join the VGC Discord as well, and make friends there. People you can talk to if you're up for it. Talking helps.




Damn that sucks. I hope things begin to turn around and you start to feel better.



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Really feel for you man, and wish there were something I could do to help. You should listen to OTBWY and stay. It's a pretty good group here, and there are people here who will talk to you if you if you want to, including me. Feel free to pm me or add me on PSN. Also, your sig gif is one of the better ones. :)



Chinese food for breakfast

 

Oneeee-Chan!!! said:
What's wrong ?

wondering this too, 23 years old, mentions parents in plural and siblings.

My advice to OP is talk to people in real life in the form of a job or education, nothing really beats having a good job or that feeling at the end of each day that you've learned something new which you can make use of in the rest of your life, you might find that if you have a position of importance or education to where you can help others/family/profit then you would have reasons other than 2 video games coming out to keep from ending it all.



Fancy hearing me on an amateur podcast with friends gushing over one of my favourite games? https://youtu.be/1I7JfMMxhf8

Like OTBWY says talking helps.

 

I say that because i have depression for about 15 years now. The first 4 years i tried to get rid of it myself it worked sometimes but it always came back and worse than it was before. After that i decided to go to a psychiatrist i was offered medication but with a background in chemistry i said no thanks i will try it without any of that stuff we will just talk and see how far we will get.

Which worked perfectly went there for about 2 years slowly getting rid of my depression while figuring out why i was getting depressed. After those 2 years i got rid of the worst of it just by talking to a person but still had depression periods of about a week or 2 every month. So i started figuring out how to get rid of those periods talking didnt really help anymore i also became unemployed at that point which didnt really help the situation. Got back home and started to figure out how to help myself and this is what i did to almost get rid of my depression alltogether.

I placed myself on  strict diet as little carbs as possible and almost no sugar ( i was a massive consumer of energy drinks, chips and everything else unhealthy) only greens, fish and meat for the most part once a week i have a cheat day with applepie (i love apple pie). Which helped reduce my depression periods to 3 to days to a week per month. Than i started to work out a run to the pool for a few kilometer swim every day or a run to the gym where i worked out got in good shape and met people to talk with also bought a dog to walk with. Been doing this for about the last 9 years and my depression period are almost no more sometimes i have a offday but no full blown depression. I still count these years as deprssion years because it still there and living any other way than this for a month will bring it right back  unfortunately i know this from experience.

Long story short talking really helped me. starting a strict diet and a good daily routine meeting new people almost daily getting a new job helped me overcome my depression and made live alot better. This is just my story maybe their are somethings in there you can use to improve youre live or make youre deprssion more bearable and i hope we see you back on the forums.



But why do you have to leave the site? It can still serve as a distraction from whatever the issue is. Ah well, guess we can only hope you resolve your problems and come back one day. =/



Make a change in your life! Maybe that will kick start your life.



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