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Today I was at a wine store, and this notoriously wild gay individual appears. Make no mistake, I'm no homophobe and I've got 3 gay people in my friends circle, but this specific creature I met today was like, the most annoying ever. And made me want to hate gay people in general for a while.

He approached me in such a silly way, that for a brief moment I thought he was a peacock, but anyway, he came to ask about my opinion about a french wine since somehow I seemed like being French to him, because of the way I look. The best pick up line ever, for sure. He also grabbed my shoulder. I replied with a smile, directly to the question, being nice but cocky: "No darling, I'm not rowing in the same boat as you. But that wine is fine yes. Can't go wrong with that."

This creature immediatly laughs histerically and asks for my phone number, just like that, and says that I don't know what I'm talking about, that he got out of the closet very recently and that HE was 100% sure that I was also gay, I just needed to have some "guidance" whatever that means. So, since I don't play around with this silly games and I'm a direct person my educated answer was: "Fuck off or I'll take your anal virginity with that french wine bottle you little f*g."

I know. Harsh words. What happens next is that a clerck right at my back (that was there all the time), said I was being improper to the gay dude and asked me to apologize. ME, being IMPROPER, to that extremelly annoying creature that was harrassing me from the beggining.

After a brief minute of debating I conclude with this subtle reply: "I'm sorry if I offended your wife there, dude."

Next thing I know I was being escorted out. Don't regret it. They also didn't have the Argentinian wine I was looking for.

 

Do you have any story like this ? I swear I still can't believe such a thing happened.