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Aziz Ansari Is Guilty. Of Not Being a Mind Reader - NYT

Forums - Politics Discussion - Aziz Ansari Is Guilty. Of Not Being a Mind Reader - NYT

JWeinCom said:
VGPolyglot said:
The easiest way to avoid this is to just ask before doing everything to make sure that the other person is fine with it.

No, the easiest way to avoid this is for the girl to say no or stop when the guy is doing something she doesn't want to do.  

Why should she have to say no first, shouldn't he ask first?



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It's quite funny seeing the allegations considering his series Master of None has entire episodes about being politically correct, even one that ends when his girlfriend gets mad that an acquaintance of his didn't say hi to her at a restaurant while they were dining in a four seat back table, which leads her to think the guy is sexist for not addressing her, which leads to Aziz saying maybe it's just a misunderstanding in communication, which leads to her storming off and saying that Aziz needs to be capable of excepting her experiences when she tells them without question ...

I really really doubt Aziz is some kind of misogynistic asshole, maybe a bit too sex minded but not a bad person. He is very clearly a liberal minded modern individual.

This is currently the best article I have seen on the situation: https://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2018/01/the-humiliation-of-aziz-ansari/550541/



I don't agree with Aziz on most things but I think he's clear of any wrong doing and that he read the situation correctly. They were butt naked the whole time that they were at his place and they had multiple oral sex sessions while there. She came off as playing hard to get big time by giving blow jobs and making out while remaining naked. He didn't force himself on her and got an okay for the sexual acts they did do. She was also free to leave when she wanted.

This is a case of #regretful_sex rather than anything harmful.



Aziz is 5ft 5in (166 cm) tall - he must be thirsty.



You felt uncomfortable about doing sexual things, but decided to get his penis wet anyway? Then felt violated because he wanted to have penetrative sex? Yeah that makes a whole lotta of sense.

Yes there are assholes who force themselves on women, but this isn't one of those cases based on what has been told by both parties.



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PortisheadBiscuit said:

You felt uncomfortable about doing sexual things, but decided to get his penis wet anyway? Then felt violated because he wanted to have penetrative sex? Yeah that makes a whole lotta of sense.

Yes there are assholes who force themselves on women, but this isn't one of those cases based on what has been told by both parties.

I like your answer. Seems like something that happens in everyday adult situations. He stopped, what else do people want?



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VGPolyglot said:
JWeinCom said:

No, the easiest way to avoid this is for the girl to say no or stop when the guy is doing something she doesn't want to do.  

Why should she have to say no first, shouldn't he ask first?

Because she is an adult with agency.  It is her job to express clearly what she wants and what she does not want.  



Personally I think it's best to just stay eight feet away from this mess. Jesus. 2018 is off to a solid start I guess



VGPolyglot said:
JWeinCom said:

No, the easiest way to avoid this is for the girl to say no or stop when the guy is doing something she doesn't want to do.  

Why should she have to say no first, shouldn't he ask first?

i dont know your age but this is clearly an answer by someone who is not used to relationships, but its really socially awkward to ask if you can make a move, you just go with the flow and do it, if someone doesnt want they make it clearly obvious, this aint rocket science its mating, its pretty obvious. she even admits she gives him a blowj** for christ sake. 

Regret and sexual assault are not the same. i sometimes while drunk hooked up with girls that im not proud of, and am still made fun of today by my friends(lol)

that only means that i was an idiot.

 

The problem with the metoo movement is that encourages women to lie. Since these days all it takes is a women feeling bad about a sexual encounter to be considered "rape".

 

its an easy way for fame and attention for girls with very low self esteem. since they literally have nothing to lose. As a person its very hard to see a woman cry and very sad claiming she was sexually assaulted and not doing anything. i cant imagine if my sister or daughter came to me one day and said that.

 

The problem with social media is that there is no consequences if you are lying. Thats why i think you should have to go to court(the police) and not make it public we are creating a very dangerous environment.

 

The biggest problem in this story to me is that this lady genuinely believes she was "raped" or "sexually assaulted" so in the sotry she wrote it genuinely appears to be written without any omission. Any sane person who reads this can see that this wasnt a crime and it was just 2 peoplo who wouldnt work out. 

 

If she wrote this but less detailed and putting more emphasis on feeling very bad while doing it, or even saying she told him to stop but he ignored, no one would have even considered aziz side.

 

Ok sorry for the rant but i just think we are swimming in dangerous waters



JWeinCom said:
VGPolyglot said:

Why should she have to say no first, shouldn't he ask first?

Because she is an adult with agency.  It is her job to express clearly what she wants and what she does not want.  

So, if you go to punch someone, instead of asking them for permission first it's on the person getting punched to say they don't want to get punched?