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Aziz Ansari Is Guilty. Of Not Being a Mind Reader - NYT

Forums - Politics Discussion - Aziz Ansari Is Guilty. Of Not Being a Mind Reader - NYT

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/01/15/opinion/aziz-ansari-babe-sexual-harassment.html

The victim in this 3,000-word article is called Grace — not her real name — and her experience with Mr. Ansari began at a 2017 Emmys after-party. As recounted by the woman to the reporter Katie Way, she approached him, and they bonded over their admiration of the same vintage camera.

The woman was at the party with someone else, but she and Mr. Ansari exchanged numbers and soon arranged a date in Manhattan.

After arriving at his TriBeCa apartment on the appointed evening — she was “excited,” having carefully chosen her outfit after consulting with friends — they exchanged small talk and drank wine. “It was white,” she said. “I didn’t get to choose and I prefer red, but it was white wine.” Yes, we are apparently meant to read the nonconsensual wine choice as foreboding.

They went out to dinner nearby and then returned to Mr. Ansari’s apartment. As she tells it, Mr. Ansari was far too eager to get back to his place after he paid for dinner: “Like, he got the check and then it was bada-boom, bada-bing, we’re out of there.” Another sign of his apparent boorishness.

She complimented Mr. Ansari’s kitchen countertops. He then made a move, asking her to sit on top of them. They started kissing. He undressed her and then himself.

In the 30 or so minutes that followed — recounted beat by cringe-inducing beat — they hooked up. Mr. Ansari persistently tried to have penetrative sex with her, and the woman says she was deeply uncomfortable throughout. At various points, she told the reporter, she attempted to voice her hesitation, but Mr. Ansari ignored her signals.

At last, she uttered the word “no” for the first time during their encounter, to Mr. Ansari’s suggestion that they have sex in front of a mirror. He responded, “‘How about we just chill, but this time with our clothes on?’”

They dressed, sat on the couch and watched “Seinfeld.” She told him, “You guys are all the same.” He called her an Uber. She cried on the way home. Fin.


What do you think of this mess of a story?



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Well thats a minefield, far too dangerous for my opinion. Going to retreat to youtube.



The easiest way to avoid this is to just ask before doing everything to make sure that the other person is fine with it.



Why do you keep posting this in general discussion? They are clearly political.



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Oh I thought politics was just about politics not anything a bit controversial



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Bandorr said:
Why do you keep posting this in general discussion? They are clearly political.

That's exactly why: so more people will see it.



I had a girl look at my but once. Should have sued that bitch.

As for this story all of this bullshit has gone too far. Time to hold the females responsible now. Maybe at the Oscars the guys should bring up this issue.



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VGPolyglot said:
Bandorr said:
Why do you keep posting this in general discussion? They are clearly political.

That's exactly why: so more people will see it.

I thought only Trump related stuff and why Religion is accurate were allowed in politics. 



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Ansari wasn't good at reading the signals the girl put out. When someone is in a situation where they're deeply uncomfortable and tense, they don't always have the willpower to refuse a request and say 'no'. I can sympathize with the girl and it is understandable that she would want to come out and voice her concerns. However, Ansari doesn't deserve to be vilified for being ignorant on how to read social signals. He expressed regret over the situation privately and seemed to genuinely care about the mental state of the girl. To me, this just seems like a an awkward situation where two people didn't know how to properly communicate with each other.



 

 

VGPolyglot said:
The easiest way to avoid this is to just ask before doing everything to make sure that the other person is fine with it.

No, the easiest way to avoid this is for the girl to say no or stop when the guy is doing something she doesn't want to do.