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Forums - General Discussion - So I'm not having a child..

WAIT. Halt the congratulations, there's no congratulations to be had here.

So, basically back in late July I slept with this girl (Omg a VGchartzer actually having relations?)

Anyway, she forgot to take her pill and now she's pregnant. Woohoo, anyway. So She's known for a few days and only brought it to my attention 2 hours ago and I'm a little bit jarred, well A fucking fuck tonne jarred. 

We have been friends for a little while and just decided to have sex because well, I'm male she's female and we have needs, one time done and dusted. She's 20 I'm 21.  

Now, I've just started college again the UK doing an applied science and medical science course in the hopes of going to university and spending 3 years there, but now I highly doubt I'll be able to do that and get my future and life sorted out because of this. My main concern is I don't see why she would want to have a child with me, why she would think it's a good idea that 2, 21 year old friends should raise a human being. The idea of having me as my dad would terrify me. 

So we're currently talking and she agrees that it would ruin my life and it's not ideal at all, but is still considering to where she's at 60 for keeping and 40 for getting rid of it. 

I don't want to pressure her into any decision I've only just made my case, she says she wouldn't blame me for leaving but there's NO WAY that after not growing up without a father I would have my child do the same, if she keeps it I will be there 24/7. 

I'm just confused and frustrated and needed to vent to the one and only forum that I visit, thoughts?

Updates: (bolding the most recent)
I am pulling for the abortion angle, but I don't want to pressure her into the decision.

The main pro about abortion is that if you decide later to have a child you can, at any time. If you have the child and regret it that's pretty much it. 

She acknowledges that we shouldn't have the child, and that it would ruin my future prospects and 2 friends who have no emotional attachment shouldn't be in charge of a human being as that's not good for anyone.

But she's still unsure on what she wants to do, so I'll probably get back to this in a few days.

11/9/16

She came over today and we discussed things for about 4 hours.
She's booking the appointment tomorrow to go to the Abortion clinic. 
But, I informed her of course if she ever wants to back out at any point she can.

12/9/16

Through circumstances that I wont repeat for privacy (ironic seeing this thread exists) and just because even if I explained I wouldn't be believed and it would be considered a troll. 
It seems as though it is rather unlikely that the child will be carried to term and will know by Wednesday.

13/9/16

Wont go into too much detail, complications. No longer happening, questioning whether it was even real in the first place, but I'll leave my suspicions to myself and not bring it up to her.



There's only 2 races: White and 'Political Agenda'
2 Genders: Male and 'Political Agenda'
2 Hairstyles for female characters: Long and 'Political Agenda'
2 Sexualities: Straight and 'Political Agenda'

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Congratulations.



As somebody slightly against abortion (depending on the situations), I'm of the mindset you need to live with your "mistakes". I understand it might seem like it will ruin the rest of your life right now, but in 5 years, you might be saying that keeping it was the best decision you ever made.



Money can't buy happiness. Just video games, which make me happy.

I wish you the best of luck dude. You sound like you care, and are willing to take responsibility. That's a great start. You may find the experience to be an overwhelmingly positive one. Assuming you keep the child of course. Again. Good luck to you. Keep us posted if you feel up to it. :)



- "If you have the heart of a true winner, you can always get more pissed off than some other asshole."

Is she hot?







VGChartz♥♥♥♥♥FOREVER

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pbroy said:
Is she hot?

Slightly above average but the idea of her being the mother of my child doesn't fill me with positivity



There's only 2 races: White and 'Political Agenda'
2 Genders: Male and 'Political Agenda'
2 Hairstyles for female characters: Long and 'Political Agenda'
2 Sexualities: Straight and 'Political Agenda'

It's not the end of the world my friend and there it might even be a blessing in disguise.

A friend of mine last year lost his job and is still unemployed because his job was in a niche market and for over the last 10 years he hasn't got anything else on his cv. His wife who has no qualifications is on £25k though because she stuck it out at retail.

The point in making is you are both still going and if you want you can get a head start on the housing market etc. Things which actually matter!

Don't panic, keep a level head and don't treat this as a negative but an opportunity to take a different route to success.

Also, you won't have any student dept!



I feel like this situation would be much better if the kid was 100% mine and lived with me and she had nothing to do with it.

I like her as a friend but I don't trust her to raise a child.



There's only 2 races: White and 'Political Agenda'
2 Genders: Male and 'Political Agenda'
2 Hairstyles for female characters: Long and 'Political Agenda'
2 Sexualities: Straight and 'Political Agenda'

Fei-Hung said:
It's not the end of the world my friend and there it might even be a blessing in disguise.

A friend of mine last year lost his job and is still unemployed because his job was in a niche market and for over the last 10 years he hasn't got anything else on his cv. His wife who has no qualifications is on £25k though because she stuck it out at retail.

The point in making is you are both still going and if you want you can get a head start on the housing market etc. Things which actually matter!

Don't panic, keep a level head and don't treat this as a negative but an opportunity to take a different route to success.

Also, you won't have any student dept!

Well I was hoping to become a Science teacher or use the 'medical' part of the qualification to land myself into medical school. But mainly science teacher and inspire a generation of kids and teenagers to be interested in something that affects them every day in all aspects of their life. 

I feel like I'd always hold some form of resentment for not being able to do that, no matter how happy I became.



There's only 2 races: White and 'Political Agenda'
2 Genders: Male and 'Political Agenda'
2 Hairstyles for female characters: Long and 'Political Agenda'
2 Sexualities: Straight and 'Political Agenda'

ArchangelMadzz said:
I feel like this situation would be much better if the kid was 100% mine and lived with me and she had nothing to do with it.

I like her as a friend but I don't trust her to raise a child.

Why? Have you known her for a while? She may surprise you.



- "If you have the heart of a true winner, you can always get more pissed off than some other asshole."