I know some people know me as the too hard raging guy on this website. But right now I'm much different as I used to be. Like I know I posted personal threads about my feelings before and I guess its just one of those threads. It would be ALOT to me if you read everything. So...
Just earlier this year I broke up with my girlfriend after 5 years (I wrote a thread about that if you wanna go down memory lane and read it). Then I recieved these feelings for this girl out of nowhere (I wrote a thread about that also if you wanna go check it out). And these past few months I've always been thinking about that same girl. Whenever I'd hear a good love song I'd think about her, in my happiest moments I'd wish she was there with me, and... and... idk. I just think it's another hopeless crush that will probably not ever go away. And I will sadly hop unto another crush.. but it didn't seem like it.
I read someone's comment saying something like "you could be having the best time of your life"... so I added her on facebook.... then she didn't accept it. I don't know what I was thinking.. I wanted to meet her in person first but that quote really got to me, I really did believe I could've been having a good time but I guess I was wrong . Just a few days ago I seen her first time in MONTHS like since last October.... She was the LAST person I was expecting to see there. Because I knew she lived in another state and not the current one Im living in now. Me and my Mom went to our church to go donate for their funraiser they were having. As soon as I walked in, right across the room she was there sitting. We made eye contact, she looked a bit shocked to see me and I know I looked shocked to see her too, because I was. I think I was getting hot or something like the room was full of heat. I kept looking back to look at her to see what she was doing, because it was like meeting a celebrity, I was so curious about her. We went to go check out the food they were serving... she walked up right beside me and started talking to her sister (her sister was the one serving). Like wow, did she do this on purpose to get my attention?? well she sure did a good job at it. I just wanted to say hi... or shake her hand. But I was too scared to. I was afraid she'd decline it like how she declned my Facebook request. We bought some food and as we were about to leave I look back and I see her helping a baby into her seat and we left.
After this happened I just confirmed myself that even though if we lived in Green Bay... I'd never have the guts to talk to her. But this feeling never went away. I'm not sure if I still want her or I just want to love someone. I just have a desire to find someone and just tell them my feelings learn more about her everyday.... Idk.. Ever since last week I been having these feelings. Maybe do still want her... IDK.
Sorry if it was long. and if you read it this far I THANK YOU so much because this means alot to me and I think opinions would help me alot. So what do you think?? have you ever had this feeling before?
