1. The handheld will share a name and branding with the home console "brother." Much like the "i" in iPod, iPad, and iPhone.

Not necessary, but could make sense.

2. The handheld will have the same OS as the home console "brother."

Not really the same, but similar. Anyway, it should be at least bit different since the funcionalities you expect form an handled are not the same you expect from an home console.

3. The handheld will be cross compatible with most, if not, all games on the home console brother.

I don't know if they will do it, but it would make a lot sense indeed. No more developing 2 different versions of the same games. They shuould make most of their games cross-platofrm and then make a few home console exclusives.

4. The handheld will have two screens.

5. The botton screen will remain a touch screen.

6. The top screen will remain a 3D screen. It will carry over the improvements made by the New 3DS.

7. The top screen will boast a 720p equivilant desplay. (I know there's a discrepency with calling the screen 720p because of the nature of the 3D screen)

8. The handheld will retain the clamshell design of the 3DS.

9. The handheld will retain the new shoulder buttons added to the New 3DS in the same configuration, for a total of four shoulder buttons.

10. The handheld will have an equivilant to two analog directional inputs. Wether those will remain the circle pad or an analog nub like the Vita is up in the air.

11. The right analog will not be a nub like the c-stick is on the 3DS. It will mirror the left analog input.

12. The next handheld will, quite obviously, keep the Dpad, as well as the ABXY buttons.

13. The analog inputs will be parellel to each other, and be positioned above the Dpad and ABXY buttons.

4-13. I don't know what they'll do but what you describe is basically a 3DS with improved graphics and I don't think it would be a good idea. Remeber the DS/3DS market has been shrinking since 2009, so a just incremental improvement won't be enough. Nintendo needs to design a new product form scratch and it should be more simple (in terms of interface) and more portable than 3DS.

14. The handheld will launch with two form factors: A standard model and an XL model.

Probably, or they could make a 2D (cheaper) and a 3D (premium) version.

15. The handheld will feature a rumble pack.

No, rumble is noisy and it kills battery life.

16. The handheld will feature an NFC reader, just like the Wii U and New 3DS.

Yes, most likely.

17. The next handheld will not have a card slot. It will be a digital only device.

While I agree they should improve a lot their digital distribution, I don't think they are ready to abandon phisical distribution, also without cardiges you may have a lot of memory capacity issues.

18. Collectable boxed NFC cards (or an NFC device of some ilk) will be sold at retail stores with a "download NFC function" for specific games, replacing retail copies of games. It works the same as a download code. One use only. You put the card/amiibo/whatever on the reader, and you get the digital game.

Yes, this could make sense (only for certain games).

19. The new handheld will come with either a 64GB SD/MiniSD card, or a 132GB SD/MiniSD card.

128GB cards are still quite expansive, considering Nintendo is more on the cheap side 32-64GB is more likely.

20. The new handheld will be approximately as powerful as the Wii U is. A little more or a little less.

Probably less than the WiiU. You don't need WiiU power on an handled, also while the CPU and GPU are not that great in terms of theorical performance, the eDRAM makes the WiiU very memory-efficient, it would be very hard to fit that ram on a smaller portable SOC.

21. The new handheld will have backwards compatability with the eshop. Almost every digital Wii U/3DS game will be downloadable on the new handheld.

3DS compatibility is possible (if you assume the next handled will have the same form factor), WiiU compatibilty is a dream, you would need the same CPU and GPU architecture and it's close to impossible. (even if possible it wouldn't make sense in terms of costs and battery consumption).

22. The unified platform will be the new "gimmick" and will be what the marketing for the handheld will focus on the most.

23. If there is another physical hardware "gimmick," it will be the same across both the handheld and home console.

If they want to be successfull again they need to abandon "gimmicks", I agree unifing architectures is a good choice, but that wouldn't even be a gimmick.

24. The new handheld will have some system that allows you to access online functions without the need for Wifi, for free. 4G, or an equivilant. (It will be integrated into the cost of individual games behind the scenes, much like buying books on the Kindle Fire allowed for a free 3G connection)

Probably it will have 3G/4G, at least for Mario Kart and Monster Hunter in japan.

25. The new handheld will released for no more than $200.

Yes, the handled should be launched for less than 199$, still with the specs you've mentioned on points 4-13 there's not a chance it would be so affordable.

26. The new handheld will come out sometime in 2016.

Yes, 2016 seems likely.

-----

Oh god. I'm ready to get ripped apart! If I'm going to eat crow because of this, then this thread is the bowl... Have at me!