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I beat up my step dad. Was I wrong in doing so? (Long read)

Forums - General Discussion - I beat up my step dad. Was I wrong in doing so? (Long read)

Xxain said:
loy310 said:
Horrorfest said:
pezus said:
This may have been the most detailed description I've seen here in a while.

Just out of curiosity, how old are you and your step dad?


He's maybe 52 and I'm 20. I had enough with his harassment towards me. I wanted to give him what he had coming but I tried walking away. I tried ignoring him but he wouldnt leave me alone.


I don't think you were wrong, but 20 years is a bit old to be living with your mom and her man. In families like that they will most likely be issues similar to what you posted. He wants to be man of the house and you want to have total freedom in that house.

tight spot to be in but like some people will tell you, get the hell outta that house and get your own place problem solved.

I know some many friends with step dads and 8 out of 10 of them have bad relationships with their step dads, everything was fine and dandy until the boys become teens and start pressing authority in a household that the step dad contributes his entire paycheck into.


No its not. Especially nowadays with being harder to find a job and rent getting higher . I live in San Diego and uness you rich or you have a above average paying job, expect to have roommates for your first venture into moving out. I cant find the piece of news but a few years ago a report stated that in America the average age in which kids leave home has increased to 26.5.

Its definatly too old to be dependant on the parents. I lived with my mom for 26years but I worked when I was 18 (had odd jobs over summers since 15 though). I didn't pay rent but I did pay my own food, cell phone, gas, car insurance, school, ect ect. I did look into moving out. I crunched numbers when I was 21 and working $11p/h and 50 hours a week and I realized there is absolutley no way I pay rent on my own plus utilites on top of everything I already listed above. Cheapest place is $600 a month in a huge apartment complex that smells like cat piss while walking through the halls.  $11p/h is $3 more than min wage and 50 hours a week is over fulltime. Also, since I never rented on my own before I would need a cosigner which I wouldn't be able to get.

So I agree it isn't too old to live with them but it is too old to expect them to drive you places because you don't have a license yet.



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NiKKoM said:
Pretty dissappointed that i read that entire post and there wasn't anything about sexual harassement.. That said: yes life sometimes sucks and it takes the better man to do something about it.. Look in the mirror and ask yourself: are you that man?

You obviously didn't read the first paragraph:

"...a real dick...rubbed me the wrong way."



Max King of the Wild said:
Xxain said:
loy310 said:
Horrorfest said:
pezus said:
This may have been the most detailed description I've seen here in a while.

Just out of curiosity, how old are you and your step dad?


He's maybe 52 and I'm 20. I had enough with his harassment towards me. I wanted to give him what he had coming but I tried walking away. I tried ignoring him but he wouldnt leave me alone.


I don't think you were wrong, but 20 years is a bit old to be living with your mom and her man. In families like that they will most likely be issues similar to what you posted. He wants to be man of the house and you want to have total freedom in that house.

tight spot to be in but like some people will tell you, get the hell outta that house and get your own place problem solved.

I know some many friends with step dads and 8 out of 10 of them have bad relationships with their step dads, everything was fine and dandy until the boys become teens and start pressing authority in a household that the step dad contributes his entire paycheck into.


No its not. Especially nowadays with being harder to find a job and rent getting higher . I live in San Diego and uness you rich or you have a above average paying job, expect to have roommates for your first venture into moving out. I cant find the piece of news but a few years ago a report stated that in America the average age in which kids leave home has increased to 26.5.

Its definatly too old to be dependant on the parents. I lived with my mom for 26years but I worked when I was 18 (had odd jobs over summers since 15 though). I didn't pay rent but I did pay my own food, cell phone, gas, car insurance, school, ect ect. I did look into moving out. I crunched numbers when I was 21 and working $11p/h and 50 hours a week and I realized there is absolutley no way I pay rent on my own plus utilites on top of everything I already listed above. Cheapest place is $600 a month in a huge apartment complex that smells like cat piss while walking through the halls.  $11p/h is $3 more than min wage and 50 hours a week is over fulltime. Also, since I never rented on my own before I would need a cosigner which I wouldn't be able to get.

So I agree it isn't too old to live with them but it is too old to expect them to drive you places because you don't have a license yet.


Nothing to debate here. I was only talking about living.



Arcturus said:
NiKKoM said:
Pretty dissappointed that i read that entire post and there wasn't anything about sexual harassement.. That said: yes life sometimes sucks and it takes the better man to do something about it.. Look in the mirror and ask yourself: are you that man?

You obviously didn't read the first paragraph:

 



Where are you guys missing that he has harassed me? On and off for years. Especially the past month or two. I tried ignoring him yet he would continue to harass me indirectly but directed at me. Plus, it seems you are missing he broke his word. I didn't come to him asking for help. He came to me to try to resolve our difference and he made false promises and lies. This is why I have resented him and in general how disrespectful he has been to me harassing me. I always tried to stay away from that and ignore it. I surely was guilty a few times for sly comments but I kept them to myself and had the respect not to harass him out loud.



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Also, lastly I've told you I've been through hell in my life because I have. More hell than anyone should have to go through but during my teenage years as I said I was secluded out of depression.You can't compare your situation to that when you didn't go through anything like that...I have. I am not as lucky as some of you are.



Whats the size difference between you 2? And what exactly does he say?



Yeah.. I would probably be the kid who harassed you and made fun of you about your Acne.. But really.. Sorry about the stuff that happend then but man up.. If he isn't going To change you are.. Be the better man.. Don't live in the past and look to the future.. Try to make plans and make them happen.. Sure it won't be easy but are you still that depressed kid? No youre not.. You're a man now.. Make decisions that will change your life for the better



 

Face the future.. Gamecenter ID: nikkom_nl (oh no he didn't!!) 

Max King of the Wild said:
Hold up, he sells his own car and you get madbecause you dont know why? First of all he has every right to sell it. Secondly, he doesnt need to explain why he did to you.

As for not helping him. Are you kidding? The guy cooks dinner and teaches you driving when he has the time or will and you think you are good enough not to help with something.

I'm with Max on this one. Even though the stepdad does sound like a dick you seem to expect to have everything handed to you and fly off the handle when you dont get your way. As much as you may want to blame your stepfather for all these issues it sounds like you are equally at fault. Also, unless he is beating your mother or trying to beat on you, your ass shoulda went to jail for hitting him. You got lucky, consider it a second chance for BOTH of you to reconcile your issues.



Horrorfest said:
Also, lastly I've told you I've been through hell in my life because I have. More hell than anyone should have to go through but during my teenage years as I said I was secluded out of depression.You can't compare your situation to that when you didn't go through anything like that...I have. I am not as lucky as some of you are.


you cant expect people who havent dealt with mental health problems to understand mental health problems.



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