the problem is right now all there is is interest and with the distance there isn't more time spent together to make it grow into something more. Sadly we don't get to talk to much either, so I really don't think much will come of this but at the same time I don't plan on staying where I am for too much longer, so I really don't know.

I wish I could buy games as presents for my BF but he's a casual gamer so I'd probably get a look similar to the one Marge gives Homer when she receives a bowling ball on her birthday.

I've tried before but he hates competitive games (even games like Mario Party). What he likes are RPGs (Final Fantasy X, Chrono Trigger, Kingdom Hearts) and strangely the God of War series. We did have a lot of fun playing New Super Mario Bros. Wii together though.

Casual in the sense that he games a lot less than me and that he can go months without playing a game.

lol gay people, comical.

Well that was pointless coz i just signed up again in like 30 seconds with a made up email without activating it.

Yeah i signed up again, so perhaps an IP ban would work better.

I got a dilemma for ya....

I have never been a fan of the traditional "relationship", hence the reason I evaded them like the plague. I find them to be suffocating and contradictory to human nature. Yet I do understand the benefits of companionship. Well I experimented with "dating" guys for a while and they were either too clingy/desperate for my tastes once they had me or something of that nature rly. I decided after dumping my last BF due to his insecurity and constant assumption I would cheat on him, that I would remain stag for a while.

Shortly after I met Vic. He was just getting out of a relationship as well and was not in any rush into another. In fact he did not want to even think of it seeing as he was scheduled to leave for the Peace core in a few months. SO, me and him decided to have fun with each other while it lasted. It was PERFECT. I couldn't think of a better way to have it. We had a good 6 months together before he would leave and we didn't expect anything of each other other than FWB.

Yet as Time went on.....his trip to the PC kept getting delayed and we just spent more and more time together. We were unseperatable and my friends came up with a bunch of joke nicknames for us. We were developing something I had NEVER experienced, not even with past BFs, or even my family for that matter. I was in dire conflict with my feelings for him knowing he would eventually be shipped off to some random country. I felt like I had it all under wraps until he went to Mexico,then on a cross country trip with some of his buds to Cali and Seattle consecutively. He was gone for a month in Mexico, came back for one night and stayed with me, then left like 4am in the morning and left for the CC Trip. Thats when I realized i honestly couldn't imagine my day without him. It was killing me those 2 months he was gone. But eventually I knew he would return but for how long?

Well eventually he did get back, with many a great stories to tell of his adventures. I was happy for him that he got to do these things, but it bothered me slightly that he could be completely content without me in his life, if only for 2months. I kept up the facade for a few weeks till one day when we went out clubbing. He started going on and on about how he hated our hometown and that he felt suffocated. He could want nothing more than escaping somewhere else, anywhere else really, as long as it wasnt there(even thought that is where I was.......). I was really hurt by that, I tried not to be but it made me think. I tried forcably lying to myself, denying all desires of him for a few days when we hung out. He noticed the change in my demeanor around him. He kept asking me was I mad at him and I told him no. He started feeling uncomfortable around me so he left one night, he never goes home. He must have said something to my best friend/neighbor because merely minutes after he left my neighbor called me asking me what was wrong with me. I tried lying to him but he kept persisting and it all came pouring out like the tears down my face. I confessed that I was falling in love with Vic but he was going to eventually leave me and it was killing me. I hated the thought of it and it was making me regret ever allowing myself to fall "in love".

As usual he told me just what I need to hear. He was like well I need to tell Vic how I feel before he does leave. So I did. We had a lengthy discussion about it a few nights later. I laid myself bare and vulnerable and i had never felt more naked. I wish that i could say all my wants and desires came true but that night just left me very confused at where we were.He reiterated that he wasn't planning on getting in a Relationship(same as I) and that he would be leaving. He asked what I wanted to change honestly about how we conduct ourselves. Technically we already acted like BFs just without the title, changing what we called ourselves wasn't going to change anything.

So we kind of ignored that entire discussion, going on as if nothing was wrong. I was determined to prove to myself that I didn't need him. I flaunted and messed with a few other guys on occasion. Yet still in the back of my mind i knew the truth. Then Vic's birthday came up. It was all fun and games till his best friend from way back when showed up being a total "Im too good for this, ur too good for this" ass wipe. He reignited this comupence within victor that I hadn't seen since the last incident. They just kept ranting on and on about how they needed to get away from everything that was there. I just gritted my teeth silently because I know it was not directed at me but it still feels that way. Its a pride thing I guess. You can talk about your siblings all u want but to have someone from outside do it and it is offensive.

We kept on with our normal routines until we were scheduled for a hurricane. We made plans to bunker up in my house. I don't know why but we decided to have manage toi. After some hostile vibes from Vic that night I got irritated but kept it to myself. I left without him to go talk to the 3rd. At first it was talking to him but at some point it turned physical. When I returned to my place....he was gone. I called and asked him why he left and he told me I must have been trying to mess with his head or something to do what I did. Now mind you we had a pretty light leash on the sex guidelines in our....whatever it is we r. We have had 3somes before, and we tell each other about other encounters. I believe it was more of the fact I did it with him waiting for me to return, he felt like I was rubbing it in his face. Maybe I was unconsciously. Me trying to get his attention. So during this weekend period of us riding out the storm in our respective homes we talked/txted and he broke it off with me. He said some pretty mean/harsh things to me so I said "Ok" and hung up and that was suppose to be the end. I was pretty much a wreck after that, few days past and I didn't tell anyone that we "broke up" because I didn't want it to be true. But knowing that it was going to end eventually anyway gave me peace of mind so I went on to work as normal.

Though On my way back from work a few days later, he txt me. He started to tell me he wanted to never speak to me again but he was fighting conflict within himself not to. We never went a day without talking since we met. He was having trouble imagining what it would be like without me. So we decided to really put everything on the table. We had a hefty discussion talking about our likes/dislikes of each other's behavior with joined acknowledgment to change it. He told me that he was still planning on leaving for the PC eventually. He kept asking me what I wanted to do and I told him that I refuse to ask him to not do something he rly wants to do, that is selfish. I want HIM to not want to go but I can't change his mind for him.We decided to not go the BF route just because we know we are in love. It wouldn't change anything. We don't need a title to tell us what we are. But we are still taking it a day at a time trying to figure out what possible future we can have together......

He seems to have had very bad experiences indeed. You say that he went to Greece to improve his education but that 'didn't get him anywhere outside the Arabian borders'. Does that mean that he tried finding a job in Europe, but wasn't succesful?

Regarding his questions and fears, I still don't see how what hie's doing will make anything better. He's being very immature and reckless, abnd the sad part is that he'll end up hurting others with his bad decisions. His problem is that he doesn't see the imperfection and suffering there is in everything, because he has an idealised illusory view of some things. There surely is some guy out there who will give him what he wants, and even if he never finds him, there's more to life than searching for romantic partners. And if his family cared more for homophobic social norms than their son, they're not worth keeping around. Alas, he is weak, and he will suffer for it more than he suffers from what others do to him.

You shouldn't let his story bring YOU down, because if you're stronger and stick to your guns (figuratively!) you won't end up in such a pathetic situation as him. And while I can see why you'd want to just shoot everybody for what they're doing to you, and what they'd do (they'd seriously atttack you?), don't do it. They're not worth it.