What to do when the girl you like just wants to be friends?

[gamingsoul]

Landale_Star said:

mZuzek said:

First, that's not true. Second,

The dude was talking about how "the guy has major self esteem issues" for allowing a girl that he likes to get what she wants, which is to be with someone else. I'm sorry to break it down to you, but girls aren't prizes there for the taking for men with high pride and self-esteem - they are actually people, as crazy as that might sound. To respect a woman's wishes isn't called having low self esteem, it's called being a decent person. Doing the opposite, is being a fucking dick. Period.

I think you're misrepresenting what gamingsoul said, he didn't state that respecting a woman's wishes is having low esteem. He said OP has self esteem issues and I can see why somebody would think that just reading the thread. The girl he is interested in hasn't asked him to get her a boyfriend but he just decides he will do it anyway, that shows some strange things are going on in his head, he just confessed his feelings to her a couple of days ago and now instead of just respecting her wishes, he goes far beyond in some kind of fake altruism to show how super nice he is. That does suggest he has self worth issues since he has decided to put his own happiness on hold and possibly inflict misery on himself....just to do something she never asked for. He seems to still feel far too strongly for her to actually respect her original wishes to just be friends because he can't just be friends right now.

To be clear, I don't think there is anything abnormal about his actions, I think millions of us have been in this situation. I doubt anything we can say will change his decisions because, well we all know we've been there and we didn't listen to the advice we solicited. I do think it's fine to try pointing out the mistakes he might be making and if having low self worth is something he struggles with, then it will make relationships difficult as well as life in general. 

Thanks couldn’t Have said it better.

sometimes you have to learn the hard way I know I did, but I wish someone had told me what I wrote maybe It could have made things easier for me. attraction is very natural you can tell when someone likes you almost after a few minutes, if someone doesn’tlike You, pleasing her as much as you can won’t change it, it will only bring you misery. And being friends with someone you like feels awful, so it’s loose loose.

Mzuzek your definition of women and love sound like they where taken from a soap opera, i’m Sorry but I see things very different, women also play the game,they want the most attractive man they can find, why do you thing most women dream of famous actors, because they are nice and comprehensive?