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I'm sorry, but after reading this over a few times, I could not find anything considered to be anything but a non-issue (except kicking an animal. I do not condone actions like that at all). My grandmother reached a stage of senility where, no matter how much you bent over backwards to do things for her, she would still spend most of her day talking to herself with rather nasty stuff about the people that help her, loud enough for everyone to hear. Yes it was heartbreaking to hear such things, but I never got to a point where I wanted to "beat her ass" over it.

Plenty of your issues, however, seemed to converge to one aspect: dependence. If your stepdad breaks a promise that relies on something you're dependant on, and complains about you not doing things DEPENDANT on maintaining a household, then I suggest that you break that dependence. Move out, get a place and do whatever it takes to keep that independence. It might involve moving far away to somewhere cheaper, or working long hours. After a year or so, come back to this issue and see if your mind has changed on the severity of the situation, because I guarantee you, independence will make a lot of issues you're experiencing now pale in significance...